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This is WFPI the radio voice for 15,000 Forest Parkers. Expect delays on Circle this morning, where cars are four deep approaching the four-way stop at Jackson; Desplaines is heavy in both directions from Randolph to Roosevelt. As usual the 1000 block of Beloit should be avoided, as folks are still trying to get some sleep there. We’ll be back after these.

Are you bald, fat and broke? If so, you are the target audience for all radio advertising. We’ll re-grow your hair, bring healthy balanced meals to your home and, if you don’t have a home, we’ll give you a mortgage. That’s right, no credit, bad credit or no income; you can kiss those payday loans goodbye.

Welcome back. In crime news, 10 cars were ticketed for overnight parking. Among them was Billy Rudolph’s Blazer. Billy is trying to squeeze two cars onto that slab but the police just aren’t buying it. And a reminder to all Forest Parkers: in violation of the Geneva Convention, our parking meters are enforced after dark so be careful out there.

Schools are reporting absences at their normal levels. Although, no one believes Justin Reynolds is really sick. Justin’s leaf collection was due today but he was just too busy with the X-Box.

In financial news, every governmental body in the state of Illinois is bankrupt and raising taxes. Hey, if we taxpayers can’t pay for the financial mismanagement of politicians, what good are we? In employment news, Forest Park had a net gain of two jobs. We would have gained three if Harvey Kreutzer had shown up for his valet parking shift. Forest Park also had one new housing start but it came at the expense of the house that used to be there.

This just in: The new Forest Park YMCA came closer to reality when village officials hammered out an agreement on the level of chlorination for the pool. Can the property purchase and groundbreaking be far behind?

On an editorial note, this station is alarmed by the reduction of employees in the Public Works Department. How is this skeleton crew going to get us through the rough weather ahead? And will we have to shovel our own sidewalks?

Hey, we have a caller. Wow, all the way from the 1500 block of Elgin–the transmitter must be really pumping out today. What’s that? Oh, the Park District offices are temporarily in the lifeguard room.

Well, folks our next update is at noon–that’s about the time the funeral processions start up, so tune to WFPI for traffic news. Wait, we have another breaking story. An out-of-control shopping cart has damaged a parked vehicle at Beloit and Harvard. Details are sketchy but other than an alignment problem, the cart appears to be OK.