We all need words of inspiration now and then. So, remember:
If at first you don’t succeed, the Bears can probably use you at quarterback.
Whatever doesn’t kill us, will expand our understanding of modern medicine.
If you stand for nothing, you might enjoy being a security guard.
No man is an island, regardless of how much water they displace at the pool.
The first step in conquering an addiction is to admit that we no longer have a driver’s license or a car, but still owe a mess of parking tickets.
It’s always darkest before the dawn, except in Forest Park, where the streetlights are so bright, people forget to turn on their headlights.
A DVD in hand is worth two in the bargain bin.
Cast your bread upon the waters of the Des Plaines River and chances are the carp will be biting.
We have nothing to fear but terrorists, illegal aliens and the candidates who won’t stop talking about them.
I cried when I had no shoes, because someone was tracking snow into the house.
When the going gets tough, stop for a cup of coffee until the traffic dies down.
It is better to give than to receive but play it safe by including the gift receipt.
Workers of the world unite! We have nothing to lose but our chain stores!
Don’t tug on Superman’s cape, spit into the wind, or roll through a stop sign on Harrison Street.
The meek are going to inherit the Earth, but I don’t see how.
A penny saved may be a penny earned, but Euros are a better investment.
If you build it, they will come–the building inspectors, that is.
Those who cannot remember the past are increasing in number.
Eat, drink and be merry because Forest Park’s economy depends on it.