40 years ago

There’s larceny in the heart of us all; sometimes double larceny.

Park District Director Jim Sarno was one of the celebrants at the Forest Park Annual Chamber of Commerce Golf Tournament. He was just one of those who endured 18 punishing holes under a broiling sun. After the prime rib and ice cream came the awarding of prizes. Sarno left his table to receive his award – 12 bottles of golden brown refreshment that looked eminently drinkable. He set the gift to the side and spoke a few words of thanks only to find it not there when he left the podium. Troubled in mind, he confessed to those at his table, “I didn’t think there were that many politicians in the place.”

Near the end of the banquet, the practical joker – a pal of his – confesses and turned over the brewskis to their rightful owner. However, when preparing to leave, Sarno had put his prize on the backseat of his car when he was called away momentarily. Returning, he discovered that – your assignment, should you choose to accept it – is to complete the saga of Jim Sarno: A two-time winner, and two-time loser.

From the July 22, 1970 Forest Park Review

30 years ago

Came across the word “zany” in an old issue of the Review. Enough to spark a memory of a couple or three Zanies comedy clubs in Chicago and Environs. And that made me think of a comic who may still appear at one of those venues. His name was Emo Phillips, of Downers Grove. And he told a joke one night that I thought was pretty funny.

It seems it was a bitter, zero-at-the-bone February night when he was walking east on Wacker Drive teeth a-chatter, coat collar turned up and chin sunk ‘way down to fend off the screaming Siberian winds. Approaching Michigan Ave. he took a right, hardly noticing a little old 89-year-old woman on bended knee doing the best she could to replace her flat tire.

A few steps and he rebuked himself. “Emo, Emo, Emo!” he ranted. “What’s wrong with you? That poor little old lady has a problem. And you blithely walk by. Go back there, and help her!” He turned, retraced his steps, looked down at the poor old lady and said, “Have a nice day.”

From the July 2, 1980 Forest Park Review

20 years ago

A 24 year-old Forest Park man was served a warrant for possession and delivery of a controlled substance (PCP) with bond set at $750,000. If convicted, he faced a minimum of six years without chance for parole. The arrest was a long time coming since the events leading to it had occurred seven months earlier when the man’s apartment had been burglarized. When police investigated that crime they found the man evasive about what, exactly, was missing. Their suspicion was later aroused and confirmed with the discovery that $14,000 had been found intact in his wall safe.

The arrest was quiet and uneventful, when two detectives confronted the alleged pusher near Jackson Blvd. and Desplaines Ave. There are drug busts and there are drug busts. This was a sizeable one. Legal tests of the PCP was inconclusive, so the substance was sent to the Illinois Crime Lab which confirmed that it was indeed PCP valued on the street at $65,000.

From the June 20, 1990 Forest Park Review

10 years ago

Also, from our not-so-usual crime annals: a 26 year-old woman was arrested after leaving Ed’s Way food market with a package of sausages down the front of her pants, a package of ground meat at the rear and a bottle of Starbuck’s Frappucino in her side pocket. Next time, the misshapen lady might do better with an all-purpose carrier.

And Police Chief Ed Pope’s village owned patrol car rear-ended a motorist who had come to an abrupt stop. Embarrassing. He was eyeballing a pedestrian who might’ve seemed suspicious. Just how much poise would it take for a rookie cop to write that one up?

From the June 14, 2000 Forest Park Review