Forget summer vacations, I’ve always dreamed of having a winter escape and last week I finally got my wish. It wasn’t bad, except for the feeling that I had lost the knife fight in “West Side Story.”
That’s because I was recuperating from my second C-section. So far, the doctor hasn’t delivered any babies, only an appendix and I’m thinking of switching obstetricians. Still I’ve got to hand it to my surgeon. In this arthroscopic age of small incisions and tiny cameras, he’s still doing surgery for the big screen.
You would think that I’d dread my mid-winter recovery but I figured that popping pain pills would be like sipping margaritas by the pool. When I got home, though, I couldn’t tolerate the pills and had to get by on the “light beer” of pain medication-aspirin.
Regardless of the pain level, I looked forward to time off from work and a chance to catch up on my reading. I had the foresight to take out 1,600 pages of reading material from the Forest Park library, in the form of biographies of Walt Disney and George Gershwin. I knew, otherwise, it would be weeks before I could carry these books. I’d love to tell you what I learned about these fascinating geniuses but my family is sick of hearing about them.
So, I was reading, relaxing and like any other vacationer, spicing up my routine. I livened things up by trying new sleep positions until I exhausted them all. This ensured that I didn’t sleep my vacation away. In fact, I limited myself to two-hour naps, snacking on aspirin in between.
In my sleep-deprived state, I really appreciated the pampering I received from my family. They wouldn’t let me touch a snow shovel and they fed me so much chicken soup, it felt like I was getting it by IV.
Sure, my winter break was more gloom in the room than fun in the sun but at least I avoided the arctic blast that rattled the windows. In fact, I was so comatose my vacation turned into hibernation. This is a dream for many Forest Parkers: to fall asleep on Jan. 2 and wake up on March 17. I was partly inspired by watching the Bears go into hibernation in Miami.
As the carefree days drifted by, though, I felt a certain urgency to go back to work. Unlike the village of Forest Park, my company doesn’t offer any sick days. I’d complain to my boss but it would be like talking to myself.
I know my winter vacation sounds relaxing but I wouldn’t recommend it for everyone. No matter how much you enjoy aspirin, napping and chicken soup, it might be better to fly to a warm destination. And, if you’re a male about to undergo a C-section, I’d get a second opinion.